Will Grayson, Will Grayson (Green, Levithan) - Audiobook Demo
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When I was little, my dad used to tell me will, you can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friend's nose. This seemed like a reasonably astute observation to me when I was eight, but it turned out to be incorrect on a few levels to begin with. You cannot possibly pick your friends or else I never would have ended up with Tiny Cooper. Tiny Cooper is not the world's gayest person and he is not the world's largest person, but I believe he may be the world's largest person who is really, really *** and also the world's gayest person who's really, really large. Tony has been my best friend since the fifth grade except for all of last semester when he was busy discovering the sheer scope of his gayness. And while I was busy having an actual honest to God group of friends for the first time in my life who ended up never talking to me again due to two slight transgressions. The first after some school board member got all upset about gays in the locker room. I defended Tiny Cooper's right to be both gigantic and therefore the best member of our ****** football team's defensive line and *** in a letter to the school newspaper that I stupidly signed. And two, this guy in the group of friends named Clint was talking about the letter at lunch and in the process of talking about it, he called me a ***** squealer. I didn't know what a ***** squealer was. So I was like, what do you mean? And then he called me a ***** squealer again. At which point I told Clint to **** off and took my tray and left.