Brian & Frank's 10 Minute Bite
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EnglishVoice Age
Middle Aged (35-54)Accents
British (General)Transcript
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Brian and Frank. Brian Frank Going Frank Into the Net. Brian and Frank's 10 minute bite. This is absolutely marvellous. Broner. Khun Scarcely believe it myself. Here we are, on the into the net. I think that they see about you. Don't I mean, some people might be listening to this on the radiator or even on a CD. A compact disc. I'd be available on vinyl. But you never know in this day and age Vinyls making a comeback. Imagine that goes on vinyl. Yes, yes, adjusted that. Right. So So what we got today on the 10 minute bite? Well, we've only got Darren Garage coming in. So that's right. Daryn Garage, the prime minister of Great Britain. Ladies and gentlemen, first show first show. Biggest guessed possible. So we want you to find a NASCAR there and lots of questions, but I think he's doing what he could be doing. Andre, you go. Oh, I wouldn't imagine. Is that easy running? The country actually brought in? I don't know about yourself, but it's no something that I would relish. Um and, you know, I just I think it's doing but really, really good. Good, good, good, good Good, Good, good, good, good, good, good, good. Good job. Oh, I think he's making a complete bloody hash of eight. We choose Our guests say it's one of the reasons I wanted him on the show. Too damned wanted to one or two things to say to that to that bloody person. When? Let me tell you when he When he when he comes along later on the 10 minute bite. So you thought you liked to Boon for Christ Like Frank is a bloody blackguard. A real bloody blackguard. Andi will be looking into that a little bit later on. So one remains is for us to watch the first episode off the 10 minute bites. Occasionally, we will have a supplementary programme known as the five minute nibble. Here we are, Brian and Frank. I'm sure that our listeners are very aware of who we are. We we come and came across from the UK BC, the United Kingdom Broadcasting Company where we were, um Well, we were thrown out. We were sacked. Yeah, I don't know. Question one that was brought in. And you know, I mean, you know, wait. That's probably because one of his good to articulate ourselves properly was difficult for you. You're absolutely right. But in all honesty, I think you know the UK ABC didn't really know how to take us because we were honest. It's not a lot of honesty about who's doing his broad. Let's **** No, you're right, That's wrong. There isn't much, but I think the other thing that the other mistake the Mod was was putting us on his sports commentators. Now there was no again thing about sport. Well, I know a little bit, but but now I'm not enough. Not enough to be put on a bloody sports programme. For 25 years, I was just in the UK BC absolute shot, your brawn. But, you know, thank God for the into the net on who we are on the Internet. Cool. You keep saying that, but I was saying it might be on the radio. You might be on a CD. We don't. That's the thing that you never know where you are in the modern age, and that's what we're gonna be doing. Another programme about that, maybe a five minute nibble rather than a 10 minute bite. Amo o on the modern agent and how confusing it actually is. Bloody well confuses me, Braun, or tell you something. There was a girl on the bus the other day. Well, I thought it was a girl. Tell me about tell me about it on the number 72 was coming in for, you know, a figure of speech. Right? Let's move on to our next feature, which I personally don't think is very good. But we're gonna I think is a bit try to personally, it's a bit like those bloody that those sorry s terms where our Facebook games, where you asked a lot of questions. And we tell you what kind of actor you are or kind of table you are. Or locomotive, you should bay or whatever, but people seem to like that kind of bought at that kind of stuff now, don't know why, but anyway, so where we've got we've got somebody. Yeah, we got Kevin on the line. I mean, I know Kevin. So we're gonna find out who would play you in a movie with tractor wth the annual will send you a Brian and Frank Mini bafta Salma. Okay, It's a question one Sammy oil. Jackson tells you about his bad day? Do you distract him with a funny picture you found on the Internet? Listen sagely or give him advice on how to make tomorrow Better. Well, get loads of advice about tomorrow. Sure. Appreciate your highest, Kevin. You accidentally spill coffee on Helen Mirren. What do you do? Apologise so profusely that you appear to be an embassy ll offer to pay for any damage or rub frantically at the stain trying to remove its question. Rob. Front stand, she got. But I believe I am. Next question. Daniel Craig complimenting only clones. What do you do? Do you say Oh, this old thing? Thank you for the compliment. Or do you immediately assume he fancies you and make emergency plans? Dial's ******* worst bond over him smashed his ******* head and there's no option for the AIDS. Don't swear on This is the first programme. We don't want any ****. We don't want any crap, Kevin. What would you swear for ******* Christ sake, Brian, you yourself just managed to combine. Bless for me with sweet Yeah, bless for May and blast for you. I'm getting bloody sick of this, right next bloody question. Both sprung. Your boss, played by Macaulay Culkin, asks why your project is like, What do you do? Do you make up a convoluted, bloody excuse involving kittens? Do you create a diversion, or do you pin the blame on the person you hate most in the office and try and get them fired? Thought you bloody might. You don't by any chance worked for UK based CDF Broad? Don't go personal. Personal stuff. You buy Madonna a Twix and you're given too much change. What do you do? Take the money and neurotically worry all day that you'll get arrested to give the money back? Or do you spend the money on something fun? Yeah. Yeah. And what would that be? A crack, I suppose. Jesus Christ. Morgan Freeman announces that the world ends in five minutes. What do you do? Get naked, find your loved ones, get a makeshift emergency shelter and make plans for after. We'll never got dressed in small ways. Naked. Gotta **** off. Get a makeshift emergency show on that blondes for involving Mork lack. And suppose Well, he wants for that one, Brian. Okay, so we got the results. You want to know what the results are way. Reckon you'd be played by Quiano Reeves and a romantic action movie. Well, you know, kung fu. No ******* No chance, No chance. Caf raves. No, Marco. L fix bloody Chiana Reeves. And it's a positive boon for somebody like you. Imagine. Looks a bit like the elephant man. Right? Moving on. It's time to meet down garage and ask him a few questions. And it's at this point that I take over. I think it's just as well. So Darren garage Hello? Hello, Frank. Hello on Helena. Seats so close, even sit. There was an absolute land slowed in the election. I don't mind admitting I voted for you on DH. So how's it going? It's going very well. I think that you know, a CZ well, as a world class as well as a leading world Ahs a class. We're in a class of our own and we lead. We were leading were leading leaders off the classes that we represented that if we were If I you know what you're in absolutely no been mined in all on the stage. I if you if if anyone well, I give the guy a chance going toe. Yeah, but listen to him. Babble ng Kok hardly seems family car. Forget you're babbling Brooks, you babbling car to say something. When I agreed to come onto your programme, I didn't expect I didn't expect the Spanish Inquisition. I think she's amazing to close it. Well, allow me to be the Spanish inquire. Blood is Ishan. Listen, made one I don't get about people argue Is that you quite clearly in it for yourselves The lining, your own pockets, all the Swiss bank accounts all the, you know, dive Swiss banking A puzzle these banker council tax loopholes lining your own pockets. Poor disabled. You hate everybody. It is my elderly mother. She worked all her life and she's only got about £100,000 in the bank. That's very sexy chicken feed on. The problem that we've got now is that she's too old to be cared for at home. So what are you not doing? You're taking home offer. That's right. Taking our home away from her and most of our savings. You're saying that you're gonna use that to look after her because it costs something like six or £700 away to look after her while she only eats bloody soup will answer that. Well, it's expensive. Suit valleys. Name yes. Um, As you know, breakfasts can cost anything up to £39. And Daryn garage, You're a ****. Those chairs are vory stronger to tell you before the show. Sure, if we'll be back next week, just punched a battling **** in the face. He's been probably the most powerful, bloody battling **** in the universe. But who cares? Good nights. Oh, yeah, great start for programme one, Brian of That's absolutely brilliant. Well done, Brian and Frank's 10 minute bite was conceived, written, performed and produced by John Gotti.