\"Dissolving Toxic Masculinity\"
Description
Vocal Characteristics
Language
EnglishVoice Age
Middle Aged (35-54)Accents
North American (General)Transcript
Note: Transcripts are generated using speech recognition software and may contain errors.
a cataclysmic shift in our culture has been brewing for decades on unimaginable alteration in the fabric of society has finally occurred. We have been thrust into the midst of this change, and we are faced with a serious societal problem. Boys and men have been bombarded with an attitude that his turn masculinity toxic by allowing one set off stereotypical behaviors to define masculinity for all men. Men have learned that to be masculine, they must be powerful and unrelenting. Manhood is claimed by taking ownership of things. Money, real estate, social status and sexual conquest have become the valued commodities that represent power and strength, power over another, or what sociologists for years have termed dominance behavior. It's seen as the core virtue of masculinity. A set of societal standards now dictates that men be strong on emotional, aggressive and dominant over women. Masculinity in and of itself is not toxic. What made masculinity toxic is the narrowly defined parameters of what it means to be masculine. Most boys air being raised in a system that promotes aggression, power and rage. They watch their father demand obedience, sit at the head of the table and be in charge of the family. They hear his voice turn harsh and gruff. When things are not done this way, they're instructed to use violence to solve conflict. They hear the man of the house. Use phrases like Don't start the fight. Finish it. Dont hit first hit hardest. Give him a bit of his own medicine and prove you're a man. Boys are often discouraged by their fathers from showing emotion. Unless that emotion is anger, they're encouraged to use anger and rage to take charge or to fight back. They witnessed their father never asking for directions, refusing to seek the advice of others in being unwilling to go to therapy for help. The underlying message that sons air receiving about women is that men are strong and women are weak, men are superior and women are inferior. Men lead and women follow. That message is what makes masculinity toxic. Sadly, the lessons extend beyond the home. They're taught by sports figures, Hollywood elites and elected officials who model dominance of women through unwanted sexual advances, sharing of nude selfies, sexual harassment in the workplace, physical assault in the bedroom and in hotel elevators. Dismissing a discussion about grabbing a woman's private parts as locker room talk, distinguishing legitimate rape from criminal rape, claiming that how a woman dresses is a determining factor in sexual harassment or rape cases. Listening to popular college athletes who are charged with rape, calling their victims career destroyers and using the word rape in non sexual contexts. The wind totally raped my hair or my stomach has been raped by the spices in that sandwich. Decade after decade, we have conditioned our boys to become men who lack empathy and compassion. Men who have lost the nurturing side of there being nous on attitude of dominance has worked its way into our jobs, our schools, our homes and even our leisure time activities. For the past 30 years, I have worked as a psychotherapist in a private practice, and I have seen the destructive results of a partner who does not admit the effects of infidelity and his relationship. A coworker who blames others for his mistakes. A public official who lacks integrity, a teacher or principal who shames and ridicule students. Ah, father who spanks his Children. A college student who seeks a different sexual partner each weekend, a teenage boy who threatens to spread rumors about a girl if she doesn't send him a nude selfie husband who repeatedly yells at his depressed.