Audio Book / Inspirational / Dramatic reading
Middle Aged (35-54)
Note: Transcripts are generated using speech recognition software and may contain errors.
January 19th 2005. Matthew says goodbye. This afternoon I was working in the backyard while Debbie was laying down with Matthew on the food Thanh bed. We made up for him in the living room. When I was coming in, Matthew was sitting up and looking around a very rare occurrence. Debbie told me that Matthew had asked that I sit down with him on the food Ton gladly accepted to be able to hang with Matthew while he was actually awake, as well as take a break from working. I came over to where he was sitting. He put up his arms and gave me his puppy dog eyes, which means he wants a daddy hug. I lovingly hugged him, being very careful not to hurt him, and then sat down. Debbie got up and went to the kitchen to drop his hourly morphine dose. Since this weekend, Matthew has gone downhill rapidly. He slept for 23 hours on Monday and Tuesday and was sleeping through most of Wednesday. By this time, when he is awake, he is extremely groggy and half closed eyes and extremely slurred speech. In fact, he has mostly stopped talking ever since Sunday, took too much energy to talk. I was very surprised that he was actually sitting up. Now we just sent there and stared into each other's eyes. We have always been able to communicate the love we felt for one another just by looking into each other's eyes. Even though he had a foggy look in his eyes. We were getting the message across to each other. Matthew lean back down onto his pillow, still looking at me. I could tell he was concentrating very hard for a minute. And then all of a sudden, the veil lifted from his groggy eyes and they shown they shone bright and strong. I could see the old Matthew staring back at me, he gently said. A few. There was such warmth, such compassion in his voice as he spoke, those three little words. He then gave me a beautiful smile that I haven't seen for such a long time. It was radiant. I smiled back with tears in my eyes and told him that I loved him very much, too. They became back and sat down next to him. He turned his head and flashed a smile at her as well, her heart melted. We haven't seen him smile for far too long. It was the best smile I have ever seen in my entire life. Matthew then laid his head down on the pillow, closed his eyes and relaxed. I put my mouth by his ear and whispered, You are the best son the dad could ever have. I will love you for a whole eternity. I gently told him that it was okay now and that I would be with him again. When I reached heaven, he nodded slowly. Inside, Matthew gently and peacefully slipped into a coma. Soon after, Debbie and I realized that Matthew was telling us goodbye. His beautiful smile was telling us that he wasn't scared and that he would be okay. He fully understands the beauty, love and glory that await him in heaven. Wants his soul departs. It's worn out casing. The central brain functions that control breathing and circulation are always the last to fully shut down. He will be in a coma until his brain realizes that it is no longer needed and just let's go. God answered our prayers. We prayed so hard for Matthew to have a peaceful passing with his loved ones and the chance to say one last goodbye. God bless you all