Chronicles of the Decidedly Single
Description
Vocal Characteristics
Language
EnglishVoice Age
Young Adult (18-35)Accents
North American (General) North American (US West Coast - California, Portland)Transcript
Note: Transcripts are generated using speech recognition software and may contain errors.
picture it. Me sitting at the misfit table at my little sister's wedding. My baby sister, whom, after knowing a guy for six weeks, proclaimed he was the one and decided What the heck. We should just get married after he serenaded her at a community center dodgeball tournament. Who does that? So I'm sitting there at the misfit table, and Caroline decides to go to the ladies room forever, leaving me alone with people I barely knew Well, two of them were second cousins, twice removed on my father's side. But stranger still the same, then Miss Peacock. I call her that because her hair was literally piled on her head in the form of a peacock spray, complete with feathers and ribbon and gemstones. She's my sister's former kindergarten teacher. My mom invites her to everything. I don't know why she comes anyway. Miss Peacock turned to me and professed proudly. Your girlfriend is very pretty when someone of her age, which I put somewhere around 70 uses the word girlfriend. You don't think much of it because that's what they called their lady friends when they were my age. But her tone suggested she was trying to be woke, implying she knew that Caroline and I were more than just shopping buddies. I just sat there and smiled, not wanting to confirm or deny her insinuation. Being single was hard enough, but in that moment I was perfectly fine with being a lesbian with a pretty date, because at least then I wasn't alone. Truth. I'm not proud of it. The worst, unbeknownst to me, was yet to come.