The Voice of Brooklyn

I'm tired of hearing it, what a great vocal tone I have, how authentic my New York accent is and how I could make money with my Lothario like voice. Time to put their money where my mouth is. You gotta eat, right? Yeah, me too, and this New York rent is breakin' my balls. So I got the Blue Yeti microphone and I record stuff for friends on an old version of Adobe Audition or the windows recording software that gives me multiple file format output options. You see, ten years ago I used to DJ on a shoutcast radio station with my own rock and roll show and it was ball. As a goof, I'd do space news for the online video game the radio station was based on. That's when it started. The fans telling me I should be on the radio and what a beautiful voice you have and you should be an announcer and oh and oh... So I'm workin' phone support for a tech company. For ten years I keep hearing this, not on every call, but a lot of calls, more than once a week. Sometimes women telling me what a damn smooth, sexy voice I have or a guy tellin' me my voice is so this or that (commanding, assuring, authoritative, blah, blah). Ten years I'm hearing this over and over and over, week after week. To put me over the top, yesterday this one lady tells me, Damn, I'd listen to you read the back of a cereal box just to hear more of your voice! Of course, this pisses off my wife and yet, begs the question. Why not? I'm just like everyone else trying to pay the bills and get ahead so I can own my own house someday. Screw it, I'm doin' this voice acting thing. Nobody needs to see my ugly mug and maybe I can make enough to get a freakin' house already and quit this renting crap. If I get lucky, I get to be a voice on some movie or show that makes it big. So that's that and that's pretty much all I wanna say about myself. Oh yeah, I like my privacy.