Jobs for the Toons'

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Animation
22
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Description

This is a sketch I wrote and performed whilst at drama school. I played all the characters and it was done in one single take with no edits.

Vocal Characteristics

Language

English

Voice Age

Young Adult (18-35)

Accents

British (England - Liverpool, Manchester, Lancashire, Cheshire) British (General) British (Received Pronunciation - RP, BBC) Spanish (Central American)

Transcript

Note: Transcripts are generated using speech recognition software and may contain errors.
Hello. Come in. Sit down, everyone. Hi, I'm David. Before we start, I want to tell you a bit about me. I'm gonna be working with you all for the next few months until you will find suitable jobs and vocations. Now, I've only started dealing with people of your calibre only just recently, because swell. Well, because your cartoon characters, however, things have changed because of new laws. New rights for people, tunes, borders being opened up, etcetera, etcetera. So we're gonna go around and say how we're getting on job hunting in the human world. Let's start with you boules. Is that right? Sounds French. Boules. Buh buh buh buh lt's boots drew boop, boop, boop! But our rules bubbles. Sorry, Bubbles. It was the berry that did it. Carry on rebels, the name friends, the game. I used to work in the cloud factory in tune time, but I decided I wanted to work in the real world with human beings. Yes, well, I mean going from a cloud factory to a sales assistant that boots is a very big step indeed. That and working with real people, I love it all. The lovely surprise things that make bubbles. That's the same as my name. Yes, I mean, initially, I thought that might have been why you chose to work in that particular shop. You've proved me right. Thank you. Right now, can you tell us your name and how you doing? My name is Mr February and I used to work in the Toon Town Animal Park. But now I work for the City Council Building company. That's great football. One advantage you have over your bog, Standard builder. Feeble is the sense that well, that your stretchy on DH well, you can actually be physically hurt. I mean, you fall off a tall scaffolding, you'll pause in mid air for a few seconds and do that big guy ********. Then you'll fall in and sort of splatter. And then you'll duel that thing where you put your thumb in your mouth and blow yourself back up and get back on with the job in hand. Whereas a normal builder would probably die. Yes, I fall off a few buildings in my life, and I've lived to talk about it. Yeah, I mean, already, you won't step ahead of the game. You'll be a safer investment. for the site manager because health costs will be lower and you can do things that the others can't do. Actually, on the only one who does work the human builders, the all the jobs to me, which is really nice of them. Typical bloody builders. My dad always said the most important piece of equipment on a building site was the kettle. Ah! Ah! Sorry. It's a little in joke. Really? Ah, sorry. Sorry. Carry on. Hello. I'm Bunker. I never had a job in Toontown because I had a bit of a reputation for being a bit crazy and a little bit destructive. So I decided to come and work in the human world where I don't have a reputation. Okay, now, Bunker, you're a clown. Aren't you being correct? What have we got for him, Johnny? Stick around for more state the obvious coming up after these messages. Are you clever? Too intelligent to face the world. Then why not try our new stupid pills? Take one every morning, and if you're lucky, you could be a stupid Is this bozo here? Uh, okay, A little bit rude, but it's early days. I don't mind a bit of friendly banter. I can understand the whole reputation thing just from that you see Now, why do you think people would consider you destructive? Your guess is as good as mine chuckles. Could it perhaps be the fact that you've got a massive hammer like with you all the time? I never thought of it that way before. Well, what a careers advisers for So last but not least, we have a couple here. So would you like to tell us your names? I, um diabolic Oh, and denying him his reign. Tan sleeve Clunk. Now, you two had a few issues we have to tackle first. You remember? I do. Yes, we gained. Yeah. I mean, the basic problem with you two was well, that you were evil. Really, wasn't it on a job seeker? It's not good to have that kind of mind frame when you go into an interview because employers tend to steer clear off people like you. Evil people. I mean, not tombs don't mean to sound racist. The will perish in my hands, My lord. It is a little wound up. Last job didn't go too well. You'll see. Yeah, I know. I mean, I tried to find a place that would best suit your credentials. Lawyers, policemen, insurance salesmen, call centre workers. And what is it that you do it now? Traffic wardens. It's not the bad guy. Go through Tink. It's like there's no tomato car. Goons will pay the ultimate price. See, we turn the dials in the metres forward and give them the ticket, and there's nothing they can do. Ah, yeah, Um, I'm not sure that's entirely legal, guys, but it's a hard habit to shake. I mean, I understand that law enforcement in Toontown is a little different to here. I mean, you guys have your little chairs with your zip in zip out routine, but of a Benny Hill run around. Fun giggles and the situation never really gets resolved. But in the real world, however, it's not just a funny flash in the pan. It's an ongoing process, which can result in fines and even possible gaol sentence. I don't know how a cartoon character would do in a place like strange ways that might make sure time or funnier. Yes, thank you bonkers for that image, right happens in the showers in prison. It's move. Yeah, probably best leaving that for another time. Bubbles eso Thank you. Diabolical and clunk. You will come. He is okay now. We have a new member of the group here today. Would you like to tell us what your name is? Hello? My name's dippy. I'm looking for a job in the real world because people in Toontown say I'm stupid. Oh, good. So I'm just reading through your CV here, dippy. You describe yourself as slow, unorganised, dim, moronic, oblivious, somewhat irritating and generally a bit. Think. Yeah, that's me, Mr David. Right. Well, I think I may have a job for you here. It's a long shot, but it does fit the criteria. There's currently a position available for the head of the Ardent School of Theatre.