Open Mic Wednesday

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Description

I made a scene \"Open Mic Night\" at a bar.

Vocal Characteristics

Language

English

Voice Age

Middle Aged (35-54)

Accents

North American (General) North American (US General American - GenAM) North American (US South)

Transcript

Note: Transcripts are generated using speech recognition software and may contain errors.
Hey, Yeah, yeah, that's ready to make up a little bit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right. That's right. All right. When you went to, hey check my messages. Hello is right. We could everybody could. That's what's up D. J. You ready? Thanks for here. Hey miller. Yeah, you ready? Oh yeah, I'm ready. Ready? All right, what do you do? Mhm. And so you, Hey, everybody. Welcome to open mic Wednesday and cutie burry grill. I have your host Milby. Let's get it going, y'all, come on. I've got muscles like superman trainer, a real, real rare life super saiyan mango. I don't stop. Stop done Lucifer satan. I gotta do rings on, jupiter escaping. I meant to say Saturn. I switched up the pattern. I'm smoking on some chatter. Got me higher than the latter. Thanks. Um, platter, my baby mamas battery. You looked like **** jagger Greece later. Oh yeah, Hot, hot, hot, jumping out the grease. Once again, it's open mic Wednesdays at Cuddy's Bar and Grill and I am your host milk be everybody's looking good tonight. This is my DJ Scorpio DJ Scorpio is in the building. Ladies and gentlemen, hey, we're gonna go ahead and get this thing going tonight. Make sure you take care of your service and your bartender and we're gonna make it happen. All right. Our first act tonight is coming to you from the other side of the trailer park he is. Ezekiel Bartholomew Jenkins better known as easy be give him a round of applause please and welcome him to the stage please. All right. All right, thank you. Thank you. Thank you everyone, once again, my name is Ezekiel Bartholomew Jenkins, you can call him an easy beat. I'm gonna do a little stand up comedy for you all tonight. Hopefully somebody find me and I get famous in this thing. So here we go. So this guy is new in town and he goes to a bar so you can get accustomed to his new environment, right? So he orders a whiskey shooter and boom, he knocks back his whiskey shooter and he's looking around And as he looks down at the end of the Bari sees a char that says $10,000 win me. So he orders another whiskey shoot and he says, hey bartender, tell me about this jar down there that says $10,000 Win me on it. He knocks back his whiskey shooter. The bartender says, well **** son gives them a whiskey shooter on the house and says, there's three tasks that you got to do to win that $10,000 in that jar down there. The first task is you have to drink one gallon of perfectly aged rye in a minute or less, one minute or less Perfectly aged Rai one gallon, That's your first test to try to get that $10,000 in that jar. The second task of the $10,000 in HR, you have to pull a tooth of a pit bull, no anesthesia, the tooth is sore and the pit bull is man. So first you have to drink a gallon of perfectly aged Ryan the minute or less. The second thing you have to do is to pull a tooth of a pit book, an angry pit bull. Now the third thing that you have to do to get that $10,000 is you have to make sweet love to a very, very, very undesirable woman that we have upstairs back there If you can drink the gallon of Ryan the minute or less pull the tooth of the pit bull and make sweet love to this lady that we got upstairs. $10,000 is all yours got says no, I'm just gonna pass on it right now. He takes another whiskey shooter and he goes home. So about two weeks later he comes back in the barn says Bartender might go for that $10,000. So the bartender pulls out this gallon of perfectly aged, ride starts the clock and the guy starts drinking, Oh he's drinking and drinking and drinking words coming down, his eyes, nose is running, starts going all over the place and 52 seconds later, who the rise all gone, he's done. He could barely stand up. So the bartender give them a pair of pliers and says he's going there to take care of that pit bull son. So he wobbles in there and he started his own in there and he closes the door and all you hear is furniture moving, there's a bunch of rumbling, that pit bulls howling, he's screaming, glasses breaking, everything's going on in there. About 10 minutes later, everything goes silent. Mhm. Dad opens the door, comes out, shirt, tired pants off toward the hill and back. He says, now, where's the woman with the bed too? What my name's Isaac. You bark out of you, take these ladies and gentlemen, you can tell me easy be. Thank you. Good night, Ezekiel, Bartholomew, Jenkins. Ladies and gentlemen, Easy be. Give him another round of applause. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Well, he sure is funny. He sure is funny. Make sure once again, did you take care of your service and your bartenders here at Katie's bar and grill And once again, it's open mic Wednesday. We are having fun tonight. This segment is brought to you by Q tina Honeycutt Tax service. If you need your taxes done legally, she doesn't do anything illegal. You can give her a call at 3465003494. She's very good. She's very accurate and she gets your tax refunds back very quickly. Thank you very much.