A Blurt in Time - Audiobook Narration
Description
Vocal Characteristics
Language
EnglishVoice Age
Teen (13-17)Accents
North American (Canadian - Maritimes) North American (Canadian-General) North American (General) North American (US General American - GenAM)Transcript
Note: Transcripts are generated using speech recognition software and may contain errors.
a blurt in time. The tale of a time traveling toilette written by Steve Vernon, narrated by David Carroll. Forward time is sure a funny thing. Looking back from the where I am to the were I used to be. I am pretty sure that if I had not hit King Kong with Darth Vader's head on top of Citadel Hill at that time, then I would most likely not have traveled back in time the way that I did, and that I would most likely not have gotten myself shot by the one armed color sergeants. Toilet bowl goes the way that this all happened. Let me just blurt this out and get it over with. I know that you don't want to be stuck here reading a dumb old history book when you really would rather be playing outside or messing around trying to correct the 32nd level of the latest possible update of I don't really know how many levels this game has actually got, but I sure intend to find out, or even just twittering about on Twitter or finding out how many of your friends have just unfriended you on Facebook. But you really ought to give me a chance and just listen a little. I know that a lot of books start with a forward, but this is going to take me a whole lot more than four whole words to explain it to you. And I won't necessarily always be going forward while I'm doing it. But if you boiled it right down to the beef Boone, I guess that it all started with me not really wanting to be right where I was at the knot. Wind part came afterwards. Let me go back now and tell it to you the way that I think it really happened. My name is Burt, but everyone calls me blurt. I'll tell you why they call me blurting just a little bit. I am sorry. Am I going too fast for you? Was that first paragraph just a bit too much of a mouthful for you to successfully swallow? That might be because I am talking to you from out of more than one mouth, which I will also tell you about If you will give me just half of a chance. Forgive me if I'm repeating myself, but time traveling will do that to a fellow. It is a little like eating cucumbers. Sometimes they repeat on you. For now, Let me just tell it to you the way that I remember how it happened. And you can tell me where I went wrong along the way. I suppose that is a heck of a whole lot more than four words, isn't it? Sorry. Math was never my strong point. Let me start this over. I guess this whole thing really began with the Citadel High School. First ever annual parade of pumpkins and now a thundering pal. Skloot, Part one King Kong in the Citadel Hill Death Star, Chapter one The secret origin of the parade of pumpkins. I didn't want to be there. Could you really blame me? I think we had all been standing there outside of the gates of the Citadel Hill fortunes for about 200 years or so. Just waiting for the new gun to go off so that we could all go inside and be bored to death slowly by the patiently waiting tour guides. The deal was that we had to wait on account of they were firing the noon gun and we could see it best from outside of the citadel gate. I didn't really care too much about whether or not I could see it or not. Just so long as the gun wasn't actually pointed at me because being shot by an accidental cannonball would have really ruined my whole entire day. Not that it wasn't ruined already. You see, today was the first annual Citadel Hill School parade of pumpkins. I know, I know. Big whooping dork. I felt exactly the same way to I said it was the first annual because nobody really knew it. This thing we were doing was going to catch on and become something that Citadel High School kids would have to put up with doing every year for the rest of eternity, or at least until somebody unfriended pumpkins enough on their Facebook page for them to disappear from the face of the Earth. Don't believe me that there's a Facebook pumpkin page. Go ahead and look if you want Teoh, but don't expect to sit here and wait for you to get back here right in the beginning. This whole freaking pumpkin parade was just something that Mr Murphy had invented. Mr. Murphy was my homeroom teacher, and I suppose if I had been paying more attention in class, I could have told you more about just when the whole idea first got started on Lee, I generally paid attention like it was coming from out of the inside of my own wallet. Looking back, I can remember seeing Mr Murphy writing those fateful words on the white board just last week. Give or take a century or two. This is what he wrote on the classroom Whiteboard, Citadel Hill, Phil trip.