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North American (General)Transcript
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Stanley was not a bad kid. He was innocent of the crime for which he was convicted. He had just been in the wrong place at the wrong time. It was all because of his no good, dirty rotten pig stealing great great grandfather. He smiled. It was a family joke. Whenever anything went wrong, they always blamed Stanley's no good, dirty rotten, pig stealing great great grandfather. Supposedly, he had a great great grandfather who had stolen a pig from a one legged gypsy, and she put a curse on him and all his descendants. Stanley and his parents didn't believe in curses, of course. But whenever anything went wrong, it felt good to be able to blame someone. Things went wrong a lot. They always seem to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Josie descended from her perch, flushed with victory and darted a defiant glance at an and tossed her red braids. I don't think it's such a wonderful thing to walk a little low board fence, she said. I knew a girl in Marysville who could walk the ridge pole of a roof. I don't believe it, said Josie flatly. I don't believe anybody could walk a ridge pole. You certainly couldn't anyhow, couldn't I cried an rashly. Then I dare you to do it, said Josie defiantly. I dare you to climb up there and walk the ridge pole of Mr Berry's kitchen roof and turned pale. But there was clearly only one thing to be done. She walked towards the house where a ladder was leaning against the kitchen roof. All the fifth class girls said, Oh, partly and excitement partly in dismay. Don't you do it? An entry to Diana. You'll fall off and be killed. Never mind Josie Pye. It isn't fair to dare anybody to do anything so dangerous. I must do it. My honor is at stake, said an solemnly. I shall walk that ridge, pole, Diana, or perish in the attempt. If I am killed, you are to have my pearl bead ring. An climbed the ladder amid breathless silence, gained the ridge pole, balanced herself up rightly on that precarious footing and started to walk along it dizzily conscious that she was uncomfortably high up in the world and that walking ridge polls was not a thing in which your imagination helped you out much Nevertheless, she managed to take several steps before the catastrophe came. If you're interested in stories with happy endings, you would be better off reading some other book in this book. Not only is there no happy ending, there's no happy beginning and very few happy things in the middle. This is because not very many happy things happened in the lives of the three Baudelaire youngsters. Violet, Klaus and Sunny Baudelaire were intelligent Children. They were charming and resourceful and had pleasant facial features. But they were extremely unlucky, and most everything that happened to them was rife with misfortune, misery and despair. I'm sorry to tell you this, but that is how the story goes. Their misfortune began one day at Briny Beach. The three Baudelaire Children lived with their parents in an enormous mansion at the heart of a dirty and busy city, and occasionally their parents gave them permission to take a rickety trolley. The word rickety, you probably know here means unsteady or likely to collapse alone to the seashore, where they would spend the day as a sort of vacation. As long as they were home for dinner this particular morning, it was gray and cloudy, which didn't bother the Baudelaire youngsters one bit. When it was hot and sunny. Briny Beach was crowded with tourists, and it was impossible to find a good place to lay ones blanket on gray and cloudy days, the Buddha layers had the beach to themselves to do what they liked.