Voice Over: Jezebel Sample
Vocal Characteristics
Language
EnglishVoice Age
Young Adult (18-35)Accents
North American (General)Transcript
Note: Transcripts are generated using speech recognition software and may contain errors.
I'm ready, Teoh. Anyone who is wronged me, we may have finally figured out why our Neanderthal ancestors were occasionally driven to eat each other. And let me just say, I get it. According to French researchers, the reason some Neanderthals may have snacked on their friends and family may have been a lack of resource is caused by climate change. With carbon emissions rising and animal species going extinct and a disturbing lack of urgency on the part of some lawmakers, All I know is that you all better watch out. An examination of some Neanderthal molars showed symptoms of mount nourishment, implying that they apparently saw cannibalism as a last resort. That's nice, but I, for one, am already prepared to do what I need to dio in case of a McNugget shortage. Since the world is already over populated, I'm lucky enough to have my choice of which people to sacrifice for my own survival. That means friends and family are safe for now, but the rest of you better shape up before I get really hungry. Some menu items I've already been mulling over the elementary school art teacher who laughed at my stick figure drawings any bartender who skipped over me for someone else who hasn't been waiting as long. Jonah Hill and the unapologetic man spreader on the C train this morning. Go ahead and get comfortable, because as soon as overfishing closes down my neighborhood sushi joint, it's over for you *******.