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As for me, I identifies a social introvert as well as an introspective introvert. I generally prefer spending time alone, but don't mind spending time with small groups of people or meeting new people. I have an uncanny ability to harness the confidence to shine when needed and then retreat back to solitude. But this confidence has also taken years to develop. I happen to be introspective and spend a lot of time with my own thoughts and feelings. I recently went to a dinner party with my husband and a friend from my graduate program, Hannah and her husband out of our Cold War to my graduate program. We were the two people that stayed mostly in touch as the other people generally kept to themselves and rarely attended the regular dinner deeds We threw to catch up with each other's lives and projects that are new jobs over wine and taco salad hand and I explained the social situation of our cohort toe. Our husbands Hannah and I were the two that seemed to generally enjoy social interaction, and it seemed like the others didn't. I went on to question why this was the case, as I missed them and wish I knew what was happening in their lives, especially since we had built a report overworking one graduate school projects, Hannah said. Well, where? Extroverts, Daisy and their introverts. I was taken aback, surprised in her comment. I consider myself deeply introverted, with a rich in her life. I spent a lot of time with my emotions on my thoughts of the future in the past and after dinner, I was seriously looking forward to heading home at 10 p.m. Sharp and snuggling with my cat and some detective dramas. I've always considered myself an introvert my entire life. Hannah, I'm an introvert. I'm amazed you think I'm an extrovert. My husband of all people also agreed with Hannah, dumbfounded as to how I could attend a dinner party, invite people over to our house and find the courage to talk to new people as an introvert. That moment raised to red flags for May. The first was that extroverts think that introverts are all the same type of person, painfully shy, anxious and anti social, no matter what. The second was that some extroverts believe that extroverts are better than introverts in this world and have the edge Hannah and I attended. A conference is graduate. Students are first time. About eight months ago, Hanna pointed out that I had been good at jumping into introducing myself and networking my *** off. I remember those moments when I knew no one the moments where forced myself to get to know as many people as I could. During that conference, and doing so, I met key people in my field that helped me land my job. After graduation, I sipped more wine, insisted I am an introvert, and we change the subject while I pondered how others see introverts and have come to learn to network as an introvert while never straying from my true self and always finding time to recharge my battery. You see, I haven't always been this way. In fact, in college, I used to always live in my head and insist that my introverted personality cannot be changed. I struggle with talking to new people, expecially those I wanted to give me an internship or job. I hated going to parties because I always felt dreamed. As soon as I got there, I told myself, Why should I even try? I hate this so much. However, because I didn't have many friends in college, I was dying to make closer connections to people, so I tried to do so by joining a mountain climbing club. The club took us on trips to local climbing spots, and I used a lot of energy, those first few trips to meet new people. I tried to learn more about them and why they also like mountain climbing. Before I knew it, I was talking to people that shared my struggles with making friends in college and struggle with choosing the wrong major in college. Just like me, we bantered back and forth about what majors we would have chosen and how we were navigating the rest of our classes in our future. This caused a major shift in my perspective. I realized that I was getting help in a large obstacle in my life by just talking to people I liked, and I didn't have to talk to people that I didn't like. I realized that authentically bringing people into my life and vulnerably connecting with them brought us both mutual value. Quick quiz in a large group setting, how do you respond when you first walk into a room. How do you respond when someone walks up to you and ask you a question? When you are faced with a room of people and don't know anyone, how do you recharge after every social encounter? How would you typically spend your free time? How much alone time do you need? The misconception of a small talk? The problem is the misconception that surround small talk. Many people, especially extroverts, think that to meet people bill voids and connect with others is to prove that we're worth keeping around by talking about small things. Have you ever been in a conversation with someone where someone is just talking about themselves, or how bad the parking was just to fill the silence? Did you hate that? Turns out, everyone does. Why would we want to waste our time talking about the little inconsequential things when introverts are so inherently good at talking about big things as deep thinkers, introverts are more insightful than most people give them credit for. They can talk about theories, personalities, connections and so much more. The intelligence of an introvert often goes unnoticed because they're not as loud or boisterous as their extroverts are, they don't see the need to constantly thrust themselves in the spotlight unless they have something specific or important, they would like to highlight. I understand where you're coming from. People have a strong sense of desire to connect and to hear. I understand it really warms the heart of the people involved in the process of communication. People want to really know if their messages understood and that they're not alone in their thinking toe, understand and acknowledge. Another person's point of view is the first step in understanding and creating the basis of successful communication. It makes both parties feel connected and reassuring. The act of being present during the moment of conversation means that you need to give focus, attention, toe what the other person is saying By paying total attention to the person you're talking to. They will feel more empowered and acknowledged. I can see your point of view. This is a sentence that is powerful, and it signals to the other person of your willingness to engage actively and what they're saying when rephrasing what the other person has just formulated. You contribute to the communication flow by clarifying your own understanding of the issue and also you open up the possibility of getting more details. When you say this sentence, it benefits both parties as your conversation swiftly moves into those serious, meaningful territory.