Irony in the Soul by Pete Adams
Description
Vocal Characteristics
Language
EnglishVoice Age
Middle Aged (35-54)Accents
British (England - Yorkshire & Humber) British (General) British (Received Pronunciation - RP, BBC)Transcript
Note: Transcripts are generated using speech recognition software and may contain errors.
And so the former rugby flyhalf Joe Moss proclaimed to his only aware audience, Jack Austen, lately irregular. At this spot in the South Sea shopping precinct, Precinct Jack got words wrong. It is but a norm open to change, he would say. Open to abuse, Mandy would say, But many went along, even adopting the alternative vocabulary of Portsmouth's Mr Malaprop ism. Morning shoppers sneak peeks at the bearded down at heel preacher looks of disdain on nonchalant avoidance. What happened to care in the community? The big society who had volunteered for this one, basking in the midday sun shine on this Saturday late in June, bare legs outstretched upon a most uncomfortable bench, Jack knew where the mental health programme is gone could stand up with his old rugby Palin spout. Equally uncomfortable truths couldn't care less. In the FAC ng community, vacuum was a favourite expression. Jack quoted many things from books, films, adverts mostly wrong, but off the telly he loved Father Ted got most of that wrong as well, but people thought him or endearing for all of that. Joe had stopped preaching and Jack squinting, a look at people staring. Did I just say that out loud. Jo Joe shrugged and recommended his proclamations That would save us all ironic. They were outside a super saver shop where Day Glo posters emblazoned upon the windows offered convenience. Ready made meals. Better to save a few souls. The arteries have no chance. You all right, Jack? Only you keep shouting. Jack pulled a fake grimace. Been doing that lately? Joe Joe returned to his pitch, energetically launching the radical word of the Lord, Not the word professed by Jack's friend and Catholic priest, Father Mike. But more salvation here and now are not after you'd pop your clogs. Wish someone would pop plugs, clogs. Jack thought around about reference to the deputy prime minister, who had conned a lot of people into voting for him on a social agenda and then jumped him with the devil's spawn macaroon arch Tory boy. Not quite the resolution. He meant revolution, Jack believed in without thinking. He lifted his arm on a small child nestled. He did momentarily think, I hope this is Mitch or he could be arrested, but it wass knew it. Wass. He had peaked. Jack Austin was a famed cheat in just a couple of months, Jack and Amanda had formed a close bond with this tiny girl. He knew about unconditional love with his own Children, was beginning to feel it with Amanda as he had felt it with his late wife, Kate. It was now three years since his wife had died, and it had been a long haul out of the depth of grief, unbearable pain, a pain he used to avoid the reality of existence. Amanda had rekindled within him a desire for life and, remarkably, a sex life he had formally given up on until a knobhead kiddie fiddler shot him. But life was returning, convalescence well spent as Detective Superintendent Amanda Bruce became his Mandy. He must have signalled his warm feelings because Mitch, short for Michelle and called Special by Jack, snuggled tighter. They liked it, missed it with his own kids. Alana, 25 living with Josh. Despite Jackson system, she go into a nunnery on Michael, Clearly not Jackson, as he was so mature it 18. Soon to go off to medical school with his girlfriend, Colleen, Jack could not stand the sight of blood and fainted when approached by a needle. Why did Michelle get that tolerance? A maturity, Jack would say. Tried that. Not much fun, much to Mandy's frequently expressed exasperation. People accepted it. Who's Kate? Me. Chest startled, he opened his eye and peered into devastatingly innocent green eyes of this delightful urchin. Did I just speak my thoughts special? She giggled in cuddled. Closer. Jack's shirt was already disporting a patch of sweat, and he knew special Amanda would laugh at him.