Comedic Cartoon Cat
Description
Vocal Characteristics
Language
EnglishVoice Age
Young Adult (18-35)Accents
North American (General)Transcript
Note: Transcripts are generated using speech recognition software and may contain errors.
Oh, yes, Junior. You have much to learn about life, much to learn about being a fine, fabulous feline. But it's okay I can teach you. The first thing you must know and exploit is the fact that the humans will do absolutely anything we want. Just rub up against the legs per and stare up at them adoringly, and they will be putty in your paws. Oh, yes, they'll pet you. They'll give you delicious streets. It's a wonderful life. The second thing, the key to being a cat in this household, is that it's always the dog's fault. We never accept blame or acknowledge misbehavior, even when we're guilty as sin and everybody knows it, no matter what, Blame the dog here, look guilty and whimper, even when he's totally innocent. Which, by the way, usually is why. Just last week, I knocked over the expensive glass face on the dining room table, spilled flowers and water everywhere, and with one accusatory look at the poor dog, I got the city gullible humans to blame him. Yes, it's a terrific life, this life of ours. Thirdly, Jr. You must never give away your affections easily. Make the silly humans work for your affection. If they want unconditional love, let them get it from the dog. We're cats. We have standards. If the humans don't measure up or do what we want, we simply take hostile revenge dumps on the best clothes. Well, blaming the dog, of course.