Santa Claus Physics
Description
Vocal Characteristics
Language
EnglishVoice Age
Middle Aged (35-54)Accents
North American (General)Transcript
Note: Transcripts are generated using speech recognition software and may contain errors.
all you boys and girls think that santa's going to bring you presents this year, but there's a thing or two, you should know before you put out the cookies and milk. No known species of reindeer can fly, but there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified. And while most of these are insects and germs, this does not completely rule out flying reindeer. There are two billion Children in the world, but since santa doesn't appear to handle the muslim, hindu, jewish and buddhist Children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total 300 78 million, according to the Population reference Bureau. At an average rate of 3.5 Children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each santa has 31 hours of christmas to work with. Thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west. This works out to 822.6 visits per second. That is to say that for each christian household with good Children, santa has 1 1/1000 of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house, assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the earth. We are now talking about 0.78 miles per household total trip of 75 a half million miles, not counting stops to do what most of us do at least once every 31 hours. This means that santa's sleigh must be moving at 650 miles per second about 3000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man made vehicle is the ulysses space probe and that moves at a pokey 27.4 miles per second. So, you know, a conventional reindeer can run tops 15 miles an hour. The payload on the sleigh as another interesting element, assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized lego set about £2. The slaves should be carrying 321,300 tons, not counting santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than £300 or so. So even granting that flying reindeer could pull 10 times the normal amount. We cannot do the job with eight or even nine reindeer. We'll need about 214,200 reindeer. Now, this increases the payload, not even counting the weight of the sleigh to 353,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second. Now, this creates an enormous amount of air resistance. It will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as spacecraft, reentering the Earth's atmosphere because of the heat the lead reindeer will absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously exposing the reindeer behind them, and they will create deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team, by the way, will be vaporized in 4.26 thousands of a second. Santa, meanwhile, will be subjected to centrifugal forces 17,500 point oh six times greater than gravity. A £250 santa would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by four million £315,015 of force. So in conclusion, if santa ever did bring presents on christmas Eve, he's dead now.